Weekend, 14/15 February

Wintertime cast party Friday night. Numerous confusions over inane sign. Talked to Kashi. Ducked out early for homebrew party further down East Morton. Classy and genial, delicious beer.

Sat at Bistro for a while on Saturday. Played a game of Catan later at Eric's. Went to Eric's biological father's wedding reception. Bunch of cool ex-hippies, lots of singing, a trained Brazilian opera singer, yummy food, free booze. Didn't get very drunk, either Friday or Saturday. I consider this a step in the right direction.

This morning, quick breakfast at Bistro. Saw Wintertime. Quite fun, spectacle play is something we don't get much of here, enjoyed myself. Light afternoon. Returned home for shower, then went to Blackbox to do some monologue work. Started with breathing exercises, which ended up lasting an hour... think I laid on the floor for about a half hour, but I lost all track of time... when I came to my senses, I was able to feel my breath scraping my throat and my chest and release all that sneaky tension... and suddenly air was just tearing down into my abdomen with utter freedom. It felt rather incredible, and the best part was that it was effortless. That's the idea, I suppose. Conscious effort just gets in the way, impedes the path of the breathing... this was rather incredible. So I got up and decided to read through the monologue and found a deeper, stranger voice than I've ever known or suspected could come out of me... I focused on the feeling instead of the sound, trying not to fear this big booming presence inside me, and I realized that I didn't feel much of anything... it felt so natural and easy, and it wasn't getting caught up anywhere. So I went read through the monologue, took a momentary drink break, and then decided to give it my all. It was powerful, it made my body shake, and when I finished I was completely fucking exhausted. But that voice... I wish Kashi could have heard it. I will have to do an extra, individual warm-up before Tuesday to see if I can get back to it. I suspect it requires deep and total relaxation of the breathing apparatus to allow clear passage. Otherwise things get unwittingly caught up in my chest and throat. Ah well, progress is progress... and I call that quite good progress. I was too tired to continue, but I consider such fatigue to be a worthwhile investment.